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Sit Down Your Children, Be Open About Life – The Reed

I have always sat my girls down to have candid talks about life in my capacity as a man, and not their father. Make a point too, Writes The Reed.

The Reed is a counselor and a loving parent based in Nairobi.

This is where I openly tell them how many of us reason, think, react and respond to different issues.

I have put aside the shame and ‘taboo’ of discussing issues ranging from money, politics, relationships, and sex.

So far, this has worked well for me. I have always tried to ensure that I wait for the right time to introduce and tackle a subject, depending on my girls’ age.

With one already growing into a woman and the other an adolescent, I am so glad that I managed to make the girls my best friends, free enough to share most issues and tackle them openly.

One of the things I made them believe is that what I tell them is almost the religious truth when it comes to relationships.

I have taught them to become ladies of substance, never to depend on any man for support, but be independent, well behaved, be reserved and never to let any man look at them as sex objects.

As their father, I have taught them to be sharp enough to always make do with what they have but work hard enough to be the ladies who will be self-dependent when it comes to financial security, the type that will have the ability to double what they get.

My firstborn makes do with the little she has and sometimes I am so impressed when I ask if she has the cash for her meals and she answers; “Don’t worry Dad, I still have a hundred shillings for . for today and tomorrow.”

That kind of reply gives me hope that she is a wise spender, and she will never go out asking other people for cash.

She knows I am currently the only man in her life, to provide for her until she clears college and gets employment.

And that the sweetest thing in this life is when one enjoys her sweat. With all the above, I feel quite secure, and at peace when my girl is out there I campus, knowing I don’t have to worry too much about her safety and security, especially with so much happening to our children in the campus of late.

One thing that she keeps saying repeatedly is; “Dad, when I get my job, trust me, I will drive my own fuel guzzler, bought from my own legitimately earned cash, and live in a maisonette house bought from my sweat. Not by a man.”

Well, ladies and gentlemen, isn’t it time for all of us to engage our children; both boys and girls, candidly, to win their trust and make them our friends and give them positive advise for their safety?

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